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Tuesday, February 16, 2010

In the Danger Zone

Well, well, well. I don't know what it is about my insemination days and pornographic material but I'll tell you what, I'm seeing a pattern. Last month when I googled images for "girl with legs up" I received quit a shock. So today, I google images under the keyword "danger" and holy smokes, naked women everywhere. Who would have thought?
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So, with a little modification to "danger sign" I have my graphic and I will continue to my topic. As skeptical as I am, as critical as I am, and as pessimistic as I am, I have somehow allowed myslef to slip into the zone...the DANGER ZONE.
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I have actually allowed myself to daydream of what it's going to be like to get those blessed two lines and show my husband. I've imagined how it will feel to actually get to tell my parents they are going to be grandparents. I've thought about sending an Uncle card to my brother, and yes, yes, as exciting as it will be I've even thought about my "pregnant post" to tell all you wonderful people. Oh boy what have I gotten myself into?
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I've stopped even letting myself go to the danger zone for months now because it's just too painful when I get the BFN. I don't know what is so different about this month that I've been able to pretty much break all the rules that I'd set for myself. If I believed in signs, I'd hopefully say this is a big one. Maybe I'm acting different, because the outcome will be different. I can only hope.
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Today's IUI was perfect. Now, we might have come across as being slightly too eager, seeing as we were at the door to the clinic before the worker came to open up with the keys, AND we were pulling in to our RE's office the same time our doc was. "Well hello Dr. Better Be A Miracle Worker Or I Expect 100K By Next Christmas, how are you this morning? Here, let me get the door for you since you've seen my vagina this year more than my husband!"
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The good news is that since my progesterone level was so high last cycle, and we didn't change my clomid dose, I do not need to get my progesterone checked next week. So, all there's left to do is W A I T!
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Tiffany

6 comments:

Ashley said...

Good luck! I let myself go into the "danger zone" too. But it's ok to dream, right? It will happen to us very soon!

Kim said...

Glad you had a perfect IUI!!!! Love the danger zone, it's what makes this ride worth it!!! Dare to dream my friend!!!

Shanny said...

Oooh Tiffany I'm sending you a whole lot of luck! I really hope that you stepping in the danger zone is a kind of a sign. Fingers are sooo crossed for you, glad the IUI went well. GL!

Bridget said...

Praying and waiting for your 2WW to be over with some good news!

Tiffany said...

Thanks girls!! You're right, the danger zone is the excitement that helps us push on through all this.

Holly said...

I know all about the Danger Zone. It feels good to dream sometimes because we know that one day those dreams really will be real. I hope that day is only 2 weeks away for you!